Monday, May 08, 2006

I Wake Up For THIS?!?

This a.m. as Diva and AJers are leaving for school, Diva approaches me with a Mardi Gras-like beaded necklace and places it lovingly around my neck. She is clearly honoring me, her mother, and is obviously christening me in some sort of child-like devoted way.

Diva, as the beads go around my neck: "Queen of The Bumpfmumblemumble."

Me, not hearing her: "What?"

Diva: "Queen of The Butts."

Me, still not quite understanding her (okay, I heard what she said, but I really didn't want to know what she said), so I give her a chance to say something else and I ask her: "What?!"

Diva: "What? You have a big butt."

Me, not knowing how to respond, I say nothing and just stare at her.

Diva: "For real."

Queen Big Butt is taking her fat ass and going back to bed now that Princess Bitch-Face is on the bus!

18 comments:

The Dummy said...

Uhh..

I'm at a loss for words too.

Manic Mom said...

JUST TELL ME I DON'T HAVE A FAT ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Heather said...

WOW! Ah, your kids tell it like it is. I think I'd like mine to lie.

Manic Mom said...

Heather--I'm going to teach her the importance of lying very soon, that's for sure! LOL

Jess Riley said...

Queen of the Butts...ha! Right now I feel like Queen of the Love Handles.

stephhale said...

Catching up here. How did I not know that Jess Riley was at Spring Fling? Damn. Hi Jess! I so wanted to ask her who Larry Resnick is and why would I want to ride with him. Guess, I'll have to buy the book!
steph
ps- manic, your butt didn't look fat to me.

Kelly said...

You DON'T have a fat ass.
YOU DON'T!!!!!!!!!!
I know I've never seen you...
But hey. I know a fat ass when I read them! ;)

Caryn said...

Oh, my! Guess she inherited her mother's honesty. Someday maybe she'll learn to temper it with tact, too. :-)

Steph said...

One day she'll appreciate the pain her words caused, when you repeat them to her, about her own ass, on PROM NIGHT!

Bahaha! sorry, I'm evil, and childless thankfully ;)

Manic Mom said...

Steph Hale--I KNOW who Larry Resnick is!!!! And I know why the main character is 'riding with him!'

Other Steph--may I call you "Aussie Steph?" And BTW, I love your blog--I am SOOOO going to tell Diva she has a fat butt on her prom night! But then she'll probably say to me: "At least I got asked to Prom, Queen of the Butts!" LOL

Thanks for stopping by STEPHS!

Eileen said...

I can tell you have just the right size butt. The kind of butt I would happily spank for the enjoyment of any traveling salesmen. On the upside if you are queen of the butts you have many, many subjects.

Dawn said...

How'd ya like a fat lip?

And No - I posted early, cause I don't think I'll be able to get my shit together tomorrow.

Manic Mom said...

Oh, you mean I should ask my daughter how SHE'D like a fat lip? LOL. I thought you were talking to me!?!? LOL. You have a cute blog!

r martini said...

New to your blog.....and had to comment on this......

I agree with Eileen's first two sentences!

Manic Mom said...

Well R Martini, thank you. I think?!?!?

Anyone with the blog name Martini has got to be cool.

Sugarmama said...

My daughter once told me I had small boobies compared to her grandma (my ex-MIL, whom I loathe). Unfortunately, I didn't get a prize for it.

Manic Mom said...

Sugarmama--if only you had a big butt; then you could get a lovely Mardi Gras bead necklace!

r martini said...

You have now become my favorite blogger!