Tukey sprawls his body across my bed and complains of exhaustion and a stomach ache. I get water and splash his face a bit, which he likes, and it wakes him up.
Of course, Ajers has been up since 5:30 because he is Mr. Manic Jr. and he sets his alarm for 5:30 just because he “wants to start his day!” He’s the kid who looks at the clock after breakfast and begs to walk to the bus already, even if it’s not coming for 15 minutes.
I’ve got all types.
So, I ply my kids with whatever I can to get them to school, even counting on the calendar that they only have 21 and a half days left of that horrible place! I wave enthusiastically at the tinted windows on the bus as it heads out of the ‘hood.
A neighbor and I decide to take a walk because, for the record, while I loved vacation, the food didn’t love me back, and I am a fat pig, clothes are tight, body image is less than ideal at the moment, and bathing suit season is in exactly one month.
Back home after an exhilarating walk, in which both neighbor and I are grateful that we took (and we’re promising to do it again tomorrow!), I take a shower because it’s Pap Smear Day! As I am walking into my appointment, my cell rings. Yep, it’s the school nurse.
“Tukey is here and he says he has to vomit.”
My thought, “So, tell him to upchuck in the toilet and get back to school, I’ve gotta get my legs in the stirrups.”
But what I say is that he may just be hungry cuz he gets like that sometimes, and that if he tries to eat his lunch and still does not feel better, then I will come get him. In the examining room, I say to my doc, “Do this fast. I’ve got to pick up a sick kid.”
(For the record, the weigh-in at the gyne proves my hypothesis that I've become a fat pig!)
I pick up Tukey, who seems a little peaked (is that the right word/spelling?) but then beg him to let me stop at the grocery store because, guess what? Tonight is the night I am supposed to blindfold Diva during dinner and make her eat some new things! Doesn’t that SOUND FUN!?
So I needed to buy some new things for her to try, because we have officially turned into mean parents. I have been taking her to therapy and it is suggested she might just not like the looks of food and if we were to feed her while blindfolded, maybe she would try something new? Also, we are going to no longer allow her to eat waffles or pancakes for dinner. Does this make me a bad parent? I’ve got to get hold of this problem, although I fear it might be too late. So, new rule, pancakes or waffles in the AM only! She is NOT happy, but I don’t think she’s had either of those items for dinner since Tuesday or Wednesday of last week. And she doesn’t totally hate me yet. Next up though, I’m going to stop buying chocolate stuff. Those are her weaknesses … chocolate and waffles. Oh my.
So, Tukey is actually FINE and I’m like, “Why are you home again?” We play some hangman where he writes: I HOPE I FEEL BETTER and LETS WATCH TV IN YOUR BEDROOM. We go to my room where he insists on The Dark Knight. I try to sleep because I am exhausted from the big walk I took that morning. Ha.
Diva and Ajers get home from school and of course, Diva has a shitload of homework. She has had more homework in her fourth grade career than Ajers has had in HIS WHOLE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL CAREER. I tried to give her teacher the benefit of the doubt when school first started, but now, believe me, I am counting the days down to summer. It’s unbelievable how much work they put on the fourth graders, and in turn, this means WORK FOR ME! I have never done this much homework! It is unreal. Her teacher is not a parent, and I’m convinced she has no idea what is involved in raising a family, and that kids have other activities than school work, and come on, LET THEM LIVE A LITTLE!
We get through some of her massive amounts of homework, and then it’s time for me to make her SURPRISE dinner. This is what I made: a sandwich cut in quarters. One quarter had peanut butter on it. Two had the TEENIEST, THINNEST slice of mozzarella cheese on them, and one had the thinnest piece of honey ham you would ever see! I also included spinach leaves (she actually will eat these but she calls them Pukage). I cut up some fruit – apples, pineapples, cantelope. I also cut up carrots (which she likes) and a few bits of an orange pepper. And three Ritz crackers.
For some reason, I thought she would think of this as FUN and devour the cute teeny sandwiches she would feel on her plate, cuz remember, she was to be blindfolded.
She wouldn’t try anything practically. I told her to lick a piece of fruit and she had a hard time doing that. She figured out the apples but complained that the skin was still on them. She ate the three crackers. She REFUSED the sandwich quarters totally. Tried a carrot, but even that tasted funny to her.
Am I going to have to resort to tough love on this? I seriously DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO! Everyone says, “They will eat when they’re hungry enough.”
After pleading and begging and major alligator tears on her part, and practically mine, I held her on the couch for a while, then made her a half-peanut butter sandwich and gave her some BBQ chips.
BUT, no more waffles at dinner. No more treats of chocolate. I have to figure this out. We are seeing a therapist, but how long can I go with this. Am I supposed to make her a surprise blindfolded dinner every night and hope she will eat it. I DON’T HAVE THE TIME OR THE ENERGY! Or the fight in me to fight this one. But I have to. Because she can’t go on living on waffles and peanut butter sandwiches, apples, carrots and junk food her whole life. Because that’s basically her main food groups right there.
THEN tonight, after I put her to bed and explain that now I have work to do for myself, she comes downstairs crying saying she doesn’t want to go to school because they are playing this study game and she knows she will get the answers wrong and she will be embarrassed.
I explain that the only people she has to worry about are herself, her mommy and her daddy, and not to worry about the teacher or anything she says that may embarrass her. I swear, can she have any more anxiety in her poor life?
OK, so this is turning into a huge rant/gripe fest but I guess it feels good to vent. I am now going to bed because if I stay up any later, it’ll be one AM and then I’ll get up in the morning and be all pissy, like usual.
I hope YOU had a nice Monday! Oh, and check in on Wednesday because I have a fun Mother’s Day contest with books and chocolate covered treats for you to win!
Peace UP, and here’s to 20 and a half days of