Pregnant

No, not me.

Did I scare you?

I've been thinking about pregnancy a lot lately, and part of it is because I'm about to become an aunt for the fourth time! I am very excited - it's my brother's wife and she and I are very close as she has no sisters of her own and I like to keep tabs on how her pregnancy has evolved. They live on the east coast so I don't get to see them all that much. But, as her due date approaches, I've been hounding her about her doc appointments, and she is still over two weeks away from being due, and this is her first child, so of course, she's thinking she's going late.

She had an appointment yesterday so afterward she called to give me the news:

--80 percent effaced
--Three centimeters dilated
--Zero station

When she told me, I started screaming: "YOU'RE LIKE ONE-THIRD OF THE WAY THROUGH LABOR!" I was on the bed begging for Nubane at that point, paging the anesthesiologist, demanding action, screaming that there is no way I can walk the freaking hall in this kind of pain.

Her progress is HUGE for a first-time mom and I was psyched to know she would soon become a mom! And my brother would be a dad--Oh Lord!

So, I was having a dream about her last night, and she was at eight centimeters, and she was telling me she had to push and I was so excited to know she was almost there, and you know how you're having a good dream (this was a good dream because I wanted her to have her baby and I was in the room with her and while I have experienced childbirth, I have never actually viewed a live childbirth)... anyway, you're having a good dream and then just when the good part is about to happen (my sis in law pushing out her baby), you get awakened.

I hear, "Mommy, mommy, mommy."

It's Diva, waking me up from my good sister-in-law-eight-centimeters-and-about-to-give-birth dream.

I went into Diva's room.

"My butt hurts."

I'm thinking she was laying in a strange position and she got a cramp but no, she had to interupt my good dream because she had to go poop in the middle of the night. Who the heck wakes up in a deep sleep because of a bowel 'situation?'

Anyway, bad news was my dream got interupted. Good news was Diva didn't shit the bed.

This a.m. my phone rings at 7:30 a.m. and it's my sis in law calling. I'm thinking, "Oh wow, this is it! Her water broke last night, she's in labor, she's got the epidural, and that's why she's calling so early."

Nope.

This is exactly how the conversation went:

Me: Hello?

Her: Mucus Plug -- OUT!

Like she's giving me a step-by-step account of the progress of her impending labor.

I started screaming again, "Oh my gosh! You are going to be a MOM like before the weekend is out!" I was so psyched for her.

Me: So, tell me!

Her: It fell out when I was in the shower!

She then goes on to tell me that at first she thought a small bloody little frog fell out of her and she almost kicked it into the corner of the shower.

Then, SHE PICKS IT UP TO SHOW IT TO MY BROTHER!

I am laughing hysterically as I relay this story to you, but some of you might find this rather gross, so apologies to you for the nature of the graphicness.

Anyway, I'm on edge all day because SHE WAS GOING TO DRIVE THE HOUR TO WORK TODAY! And I was like, "No way!"

She said my brother was mad at her too for doing that, but today was the day she was going to pitch her "work-from-home" plan to her boss so she had to go in.

This afternoon, I call her to check in and she said she possibly opened up Pandora's Box because not much was happening and everybody's dying to know what's going on.

She said, "My phone will not stop ringing. I am the most popular person in the entire world!"

I said, "Enjoy it now, cuz when that baby pops out, YOU ARE NOTHING, SISTA! Nothing! For the rest of your life!"

I bet she's looking forward to motherhood!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

So, that's the news on my sis in law, and that's why I've kind of been thinking about pregnancy, not that I want to have another child because I DON'T, but the possibility does still exist between Hubby and me, and neither of us is willing to do anything permanent other than abstinence at this point to prevent a family.

But, in thinking about my gestation days, it's amazing to think I was pregnant at least some part during five consecutive years: 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, and 2001; I was "in the family way" 27 or 28 months out of approximately 42 months. Wow.

I kept separate journals for each of my three kids, and thought I would maybe post some entries here, since there is currently not much excitement going on in my life at present, so here is an entry from when I was pregnant with Diva:

September 9, 1998, Wednesday:

Today is your daddy's 30th birthday baby! Last night Ajers woke up in the middle of the night so, of course, I got up to settle him. I could feel the blood rushing through my body working hard to make this baby. It was a pretty uncomfortable feeling as if I had just gone jogging. I felt out of breath and I felt literally my blood circulating through my body, thickening to meet the demands of this baby.

More - 5:50 p.m. --
An hour ago I went potty and when I wiped there was bright pink blood. I thought to myself, "Oh fuck, here we go." I was very nervous and called the doctor. Since that first bit of blood, I've gone to the bathroom four times and there's nothing else. I pray to God that I don't have a miscarriage. This baby is just as important and special as Ajers...Please God, no more blood. I don't have any cramping and I am praying that everything is okay. The doctor said 50 out of 100 pregnancies have some bleeding. Of those 50, 25 are miscarriages. I hope I'm not one of those. We know so many that had miscarriages for their second kid: K, T, L, J --I know there are more. Please God, let me have this baby...Please, please, please. I am going to go pee once more to check and then we're going to dinner for S's birthday I hope there's nothing bad, please God.

September 10--
I am losing you.