Straight Out of a John Hughes' Flick

WARNING: WORLD'S LONGEST POST...

And you might want to move your coffee away from the keyboard... just sayin'...

The reunion!

I don’t even know where to start. I have no voice left. I did not vomit. I did not have to lie in bed all day long with a hangover. I am as exhausted as if I had just attended my own wedding this weekend…

It was THE BEST TIME!

So, here's the story...

Friday night a couple of us went up to a bar before the football game and there were other people from school there. I had two appletinis to get my nerves chilled out.

Then we went to the football game and at first I was kind of not wanting to see people in case I didn’t remember them! After standing around for like a half an hour talking to people, we looked around and said, “Why the heck are we all standing around here when Dave’s got a tent full of hard liquor, kegs, pizzas and EIGHTIES music? AND his parents aren’t home! Oh wait, he IS a parent now!”

We were off. And since there were a few of us, we scrambled into various cars and headed over to the party, and it was so reminiscent of Friday night football games in high school where we’d crank up B96 Friday Night Mix, roll down the windows and drive around looking for parties! Except we didn’t have the stolen six pack of Milwaukee’s Best and a two-liter bottle of Sun Country Wine Coolers rolling around in the trunk.

First things first. We needed nametags upon arriving at the party, so I set Mr. Manic up with one so everyone would know who he was cuz PS, he is a very shy guy and I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable:


It was really exciting to see everyone, and everyone looked great. And so very reassuring that no one is really as old as we are, because come on, we don’t look like we’ve been out of high school for 20 years! And it was so fun to see someone and be like, “Oh my God! You look EXACTLY the same!”

Fortunately, very fortunately for me, I never had a high school boyfriend, or a major crush; never lost my virginity to a love-of-my-life boy I could quite possibly run into. I was safe! No worries in that department. That in itself is a load of worry off one’s back, for sure.

Junior and Senior year, I had a lot of underage teenage drinking parties. I’m not exactly proud of it now. But then, it was pretty cool. Actually, it’s quite a shame when you think about the dangers of drinking and driving, but for those of you in your thirties, you know it was a different time “back then.” Back then sounds almost INNOCENT compared to these days.

People were talking about how they got sexed up in my parent’s basement, ahem, you know who you are; sadly, 'twas not I! A couple guys recalled the party where the cops came and my dad bolted to the neighbors so he wouldn’t get arrested. Then he called the house, pretending to be ‘out of town’ and told me to get a cop on the phone. My dad told the cop, “If there’s underage drinking in my home, you are not to let ANYONE leave that house because I don’t want anyone to get into an accident.” For some reason, the cop agreed to this. The cops left, my dad came back to the house, and we continued the party and about 20 kids slept over!

I’m sure I have mentioned on this blog about a million times how I didn’t go to my senior prom but MY SISTER, who was a junior when I was a senior, did get asked. And of course, I had to remind any and every guy in my class this weekend that I am yes, still very bitter that I didn’t go to my senior prom.

(My real-life friends who read this are probably like: GET OVER THIS ALREADY! Right girls? Come on, it's my claim to high-school fame!)

A couple interesting things happened. This one guy came up to me and said he has always remembered that when he asked a junior to our senior prom, I bitched him out telling him it was completely wrong to ask a JUNIOR when there were perfectly good AND WILLING, Seniors who wanted to attend their senior prom. And it's not like I wanted HIM to ask me. It was just the idea that senior boys were wasting their time on JUNIOR girls!

He has always remembered this. I did not remember us having this conversation 20 years ago. But, he told me, because of our conversation 20 years ago, when his son is a senior, he’s not going to let him take an underclassman to prom! And then he wanted to take a picture of me so he could show his wife a photo of the girl who bitched him out for taking a junior to prom. I actually smiled for him?

Another guy friend of mine reminded me that he didn’t go to our senior prom either, and I totally thought he went to prom because he had a serious junior girlfriend in high school. I asked him why he didn’t take Jane (not her real name) to the prom and he said he knew there were other senior girls who were not being asked to the prom so he thought it would be wrong for him to take a junior. I was like, ‘HEY, WE COULDA GONE TOGETHER!’ Missed opportunities. If only we students communicated more. And drank less. Sounds like a recipe for a marriage, doesn’t it—communicate more, drink less!

Oh well. A prom is a prom is a prom, but a TWENTIETH REUNION… well, that’s completely off the wall crazy-fun!!

We left Friday night’s party at hubby’s insistence, at 12:15 a.m. although I could have stayed all night I was having so much fun reliving our high school days. Plus, me and high-school gal pal had just discovered the pizza. She wondered if it was bad since it had been outside for so long. I reminded her that when we were in college, we used to eat pizza from the GARBAGE CAN!! (Can you believe THAT?!?! We were poor. We were hungry. SOMEONE WAS THROWING AWAY PERFECTLY GOOD PIZZA CRUST!) Anyway, going home at midnight was a smart thing to do though, because I woke up in perfectly great partying shape Saturday a.m.!

I had to go over to the Westin to help set up because I was recruited to the reunion committee last April. I got there early, helped set up with balloons and memorabilia:

and then I hooked up with my best gal pals from high school later in the afternoon. It was seriously like 20 years had never happened. We just fell right back into our obnoxious laughing and snarkiness. I loved it. I don’t know why we don’t hang out more often—probably the kid factor, and the marriage factor, and the fact that we don’t have the opportunities high school kids have to see friends that often. But it was so great to just fall back into place, to tease each other and talk about those crazy things we did in school.

The four of us:


Mr. and Mrs. Manic:


The big party was so much fun!


Like we were all grown up but not really grown up. Things I noticed:

~There were a lot of boobs out that night! LOTS! And, Mr. Manic was the paparazzi all weekend, and it was quite interesting that when we reviewed the FOUR HUNDRED digital photos from the weekend, there were many pictures where the camera must have ‘slipped’ from his grasp causing him to get boob shots of all these boobalicious ladies!

The above is, obviously, not a boobalicious boob shot.

~Quite a few men are now bald, but funny thing is, bald is like totally hot these days, and men look really good without hair; some of ‘em anyway! I seriously saw a couple skulls I wanted to run my hand over just to feel the smoothness.

~The druggies in high school might still be druggies now too. This, I am not sure of though, because I was very, very naive in HS when it came to any illegal substance other than alcohol, so I cannot either confirm or deny. I just think there were some drugged-up dudes.

~The women. Whoa, they are H O T! Like classy hot. See:



And more:



Women tend to mature very nicely. I remember hearing once that at 10-year reunions, the men all look way better than the women.

And the 20 year is the time for the women to shine. I think this urban legend might have to do with the fact that at the 10 year, many women have either just pushed out kids, or in the process of being knocked up, like I was at the 10-year. There are NO photos of me at my 10 year. Probably for this very reason.

~Our class can still party!


It was kind of slow going in the beginning, but in a good way, like a “let’s take the opportunity to talk with some of our old friends, do a little catching up, and then crank it out like maniacs” kinda way. One guy was giving everyone five minutes. I thought that was so cool. He seriously went up to everyone, stated his five-minute plan, and gave each person his undivided attention, and was sincere when he was asking about their lives. At one point, I noticed he was spending quite a long while with another classmate so I had to go be the Committee Cop. I said, “Dude, you’re going on like seven minutes; time to move on!” Thanks though, Brian, for taking the time to make everyone really feel welcome! I thought that was so cool.

After a few drinks, the requisite questions demanding answers were asked, and I answered:

“Three kids ages 9, 8, and 6.”

I live in Manictown now but was in Philly for almost 7 years.”

I stay at home but am a writer and editor trying to get my books published.”

And finally,

“Oh yeah, married almost 15 years to that guy over there who has just taken boobie shots of your wife.”

We then did the class photo where the mean guy was yelling at us to all be quiet like he was taking a preschool class photo. Then the committee showed an amazing video of photos from high school, and after that, I went to the lobby bar because the reunion bar did not have sour apple pucker, and dang-it-all, I’m a grown-up and if I’m out partying, I want to drink my grown-up drink of choice! I ran into another classmate and she was like, “Were you just quoted in Glamour?!?!? I saw it!”

Guilty. Can’t remember the page it was (in the 200s) and I think it was in the October issue, but I did use my maiden name because it had something to do with S E X, and I don’t need my 16-year-old neighbor girl coming up to me and saying, Mrs. Manic, I didn’t know you got caught having sex in the living room by your boyfriend’s roommate and his parents!”

After all that, I was getting kind of tired. I grabbed Mr. Manic who was seriously being the BEST, BEST all night. He was like my BEEYOTCH. Doing whatever I said. Taking pictures of everyone for our class website. Bringing me drinks. A perfect gentleman.

So, we decide to go upstairs and put on some comfy clothes, then come back down for the rest of the party.

Little did I know, crazy Mr. Manic has a plan of his own…

No, you dirty minded people…MINDS OUTTA THE GUTTER! When he was packing to come over to the hotel (I was already there), he specifically brought unbeknownst to me, a special late-night ensemble. Before I show you what he had on, here is a reaction upon his entering the room:



And this is what caused the reaction:



HIS HOT MOM T-SHIRT!!!!



And then, it was time to break out the purple boas, and soon, everyone looked like this:






By the end of the night, I decided I needed a new nametag:


PS—If you’re from DGN class of ’87, please leave a comment saying hi.

PSS--Also, thank you Amber and Jen (formerly S, now K) for saying such nice things about my blog and my writing--I can't tell you how much that meant to me! And everyone who took the time to say hello and be so nice to me! It was a blast and I'm so glad I got to see you all!

PSSS--If any of you want your boobie pictures back, you’ll have to take that one up with the Mister.

PSSSS--Count down to the big Two-Fiver... Four years, 364 days...

Class of ’87 DGN ROCKS!!