Tuesday, October 28, 2008
So you know how I've mentioned probably just about a bazillion times on this blog how Diva does not eat food. Well, she does, it's just limited. Let's see, here's her menu:
pancakes but with NO butter or syrup. Just a few chocolate chips.
cereal, but mostly chocolately kind. Or frosted flakes.
bread. All types, but mostly soft.
Apples, no skin.
Chocolate shakes, ice cream.
Goldfish, chips, snacks, crap, chocolate poptarts, crackers, crap, popcorn, candy, M&Ms, crap.
Carnation Instant Breakfast milk.
So really, that's about it. Occasionally she will eat some spinach leaves if the moon is alligned with the sun and it's snowing outside during the month of May, but other than that, that's her whole there menu!
Today, we were at McDonald's, (and SIDENOTE: maybe THAT's why stomach hurts--I had a carmel + hot fudge sundae ... or it could be the antibiotics and steroids I'm on for my BLEEDING, INFECTED EAR!?) ... anyway, at McDonald's, I said to her I would give her $10 if she ate a part of a hamburger.
We bartered for a while. It was decided (DON'T YELL AT ME IN THE COMMENTS FOR THIS PLEASE!) that if she ate 'some' hamburger, I would give her, ahem ... how do you make words really tiny here ... twenty dollars.
You don't have to yell at me!
I know it all! I do! I do!
So, back to the story. I get the burger. I take out the prize money. We cut the burger.
Then in quarters.
Then she takes her quarter of her hamburger and cuts that in half so she has an eighth of a McDonald's 85-cent burger.
She picks at it a bit. Puts some ketchup on it.
Asks for salt.
I go up to the counter and while I'm there she yells over to me:
"I'm chewing some!"
And she's smiling.
"I guess I just didn't want to do it in front of you!" she said.
She chewed it and swallowed it!
Then to make her feel less alone, I took a bite of the other part and chewed and swallowed some too!
We were partners on a journey together! I was so excited. She was tasting a form of meat! I think.
Then she took another bite, and when I say bite, please understand that her eighth of a burger and these bite sizes -- it would have taken her like six bites to finish.
"I think it's just that I'm afraid to try them and worried about how it will feel not how it will taste," she said.
I've always thought that about her -- that she's got some sensory disorders that makes it uncomfortable for her to have certain textures in her mouth.
Then she took a third bite and I think her mind started working overtime then, and she gagged.
I knew it was going to happen.
Fortunately, she spit out what little she had in her mouth, and her previously eaten sundae, french fries, and drink did not come spewing out of her mouth.
She did pocket the money though.
Hey, a bet is a bet is a bet.
And yes, that is just one time I've bribed my children.
I bribed Tukey with cash last Sunday when I wanted to yank his tooth out because he was driving me crazy. You can read that story over here at Betty:
The Tooth: I lost it because he wasn't losing it!
Do you bribe your kids? Do you think I'm horrible for doing so? I mean yeah, I know $20 is off-the-wall just down-and-out STUPID of me, but a little bit of money as INCENTIVE isn't all that bad, is it?
Posted by MaNiC MoMMy™ at 10:03 PM