Maybe I Should Do It Daily

Drink a bottle of wine, that is. Come on guys--get the head outta the gutter!

Seriously though, after last night's impromptu wine party, when I came home I told Hubby where I had been, and that I had drunk a bottle of wine, and he asked, "Weren't we supposed to be slowing it down?"

I said, "Not we. You." He drank far more than I during our Thanksgiving 'visit' and as much fun as I had with my friends and family during our 'trip out east', I cannot call it a vacation. To me, a vacation must include a beach, tropical drinks, and the sun. Oh, and no kids.

So, digressing here, but back to the point I was trying to make. It was good that I drank a bottle of wine. I came home, put two-thirds of the kids to bed, while Hubby took the last third to basketball practice. I went to bed, lights out, no reading, nothing, at eight p.m. And slept. Slept well.

This a.m., after getting BitchDoll and Ajers out the door to the bus, with not so much trauma from BD today, I decided to begin a new morning routine that will involve three things:

1. Treadmill.
2. Load of laundry.
3. Shower.

This is my pre-resolution resolution. I was so freaking productive today! I got TWO LOADS of laundry done and put away, I wrote half an essay that I am working on for a regional parenting magazine.

Sidenote: How cool is it that I am being contacted and ASKED to write about S-E-X as a married mother, AND getting paid for it!--I'm working on it Kara, but first, I have to go have sex so I can remember what it's like -- Hahahahah.

It is so terribly amusing to think of things or to write something or to say something incredibly stupid and funny that you break into laughter all by yourself. Isn't that the greatest feeling in the world. To be able to laugh at one's own stupidness? I'm really good at that!

So, more digression here. I got my little list done this a.m., then dropped Tukey off to school, after calling Hubby to ask him, "Where the eff did you put the car keys because I can't find them and I have to get Tukey to school!" (Keys are still MIA, BTW.)

Then, I get into...

Shopping Mode.

Which means, as I learned from yesterday, that I need to start the excursion by popping a Xanax to get me into the correct mental frame of mind. And, although I never got around to sharing my shopping highlights with you yesterday, it wasn't so bad. Tukey was behaved, I got good parking, people were friendly...

I just freeze up and can't do it.

It's like stage fright, but I have shop fright. It's the same thing in the grocery store. I will look at all the choices and my head will start to spin, internally of course, not for real like Regan in Exorcist, and then I will start getting numb lips (this is a genetic thing because this happens to my mom too). So, then I'm asking Tukey, who is FOUR, what he thinks I should get my nephews for Christmas... Would they like the Elmo Giggle Ball or the Elmo Mr. Potato Head guy and then I'm standing there with the two stupid toys in my hands, trying to manuever the stroller in the one-foot-wide aisle in the freaking toy store, and get me started on why the hell they make the aisles in the GD toy stores so freaking small because the people who shop in there are MOMS with freaking strollers!!

See, I shoulda taken a Xanax before starting this post.

I feel better though; thanks for listening.

I am going to try to prepare a meal for my family now, and then I am going to yoga tonight for the first time in about three months, and I'm going to "OHM" my way into sanity.

Until I have to do it again tomorrow -- I have four hours sans kids in which I can attempt the drastic shopping thing again. I think I should just open up that bottle of wine right now.

Cheers!

Post Script: I found the keys. They were in the jacket I wore to the neighbor's last night where I drank the whole bottle of wine. Apparently, Hubby had not taken the main set with him to basketball practice. How the hell am I gonna tell him it was my fault after I griped at him about the keys?