Wednesday, May 02, 2007

The Tooth…

Is still intact.

I cannot believe it. An educated professional dentist could not get my daughter to comply long enough to stick one digit of one finger into her mouth to get the “effer” out.

And, it’s her eighth birthday today.

I took her to have her tooth extracted on her birthday, the only day of the year which constitutes extra, extra special treatment, and gifts, and love, and yummy treats, and what do I do? I take her to the dentist, where she is back there for over 37 minutes, and I am waiting in the front, thinking, “Oh my God, this is taking too long, why is this taking too long” and I’m raising my eyebrows and turning my ears toward the door to try to get a glimmer of an idea of what’s going on back there, and I don’t hear anything so I ask the receptionist, “Is she OK?”

“She seems fine.”

I know this is exactly how I will feel on a day, maybe twenty or twenty-five years down the road, if I am in a waiting room while she and her husband are at work trying to get a baby out. And I’ll wish I was there with her, holding her hand, wiping her face, telling her it’s OK and that it’s almost over and the pain won’t last, and as soon as that tiny little thing gets out of her body she’ll feel so much better.

The dentist finally called me back there. I was like, “WTF, THE TOOTH IS STILL IN HER MOUTH?” Is he not a professional? Doesn’t he do this for little kids like all the time? Is this totally abnormal behavior for a child with a loose tooth?

I try to calm her down, because she’s crying and her face is blotchy and it’s her birthday for crying out loud and what kind of mother am I to do this to my child on her birthday. I try to hold her hands so the doctor can get in there.

He tells me, “I can’t do it. Ten years ago, twenty years ago, I could do this with no problem, but the climate in this town…” He thinks I’ll sue him! Or that one of his patients (and the office is filling up) will file a suit on him for mistreating a little girl, a little girl who happens to be celebrating her birthday, a little girl screaming hysterically on her birthday—what a way to say Happy Freaking Birthday.

We leave. In the car, she is crying, and I start crying too. “I’m so sorry, honey! I feel so terrible, I am so, so, so sorry! I didn’t want your birthday to start out this way,” I say.

“It’s OK mommy. It’s OK.”

You know, I don’t really know if it is OK. And now my baby girl, who is eight today, is at school, with a dangling tooth that’s causing her to talk like she has a mouthful of spit, causing her to not be able to eat her favorite foods on her birthday, causing her to get so upset she doesn’t eat but instead vomits stomach acid.

I can tell you this for certain. She will always remember her eighth birthday. I just hope that later today, I can make this a happier and brighter day for my precious, precious little Diva Girl.

32 comments:

Just A Girl In GA said...

I am sorry for you little girl, I fully understand when I was younger I was freaked out by teeth falling out. I would like to say it will get better - but in my late 30's I am still freaked out over it. Happy Birthday Diva!!!

Mz Jackson said...

Omigosh, that kid has a will of iron. One good thing though, you get a child like that pointed in the right direction and no one will be able to talk them into anything they don't want to do...i.e. peer pressure.

Lisa said...

What a wussy dentist! I'm assuming that this tooth is hanging by a thread or two. This is just like removing the band-aid. You sit her down, look her in the face, and ask her (smiling) if she wants this saga to be over. Of course she does, and you're going to help her. Remind her of times she's been brave - really sell this. Together you guys are going to get pumped up and fix this, so she can get on to cake and presents. Kleenex around the tooth, a quick twist and pull. Judge whether or not you want to count till three, and just do it.

When I was about 8, I got the mother of all slivers in my foot. It was about two inches long and the wood was all broken up. My father, armed with tweezers set about removing the tiny pieces, while I screamed "I wish I'd never been born" for about 45 minutes.

It's Diva vs. a dead tooth and your precious girl is stong enough to muster up the pluck to emerge victorious. You might need a cocktail to muster the pluck - regardless, now go rip that tooth out of your baby's head.

Kim Stagliano said...

Poor sweet baby!

Trish Ryan said...

Diva is right - it will be okay! Ten years from now, this will be a funny family story you all tease her about and she will remember her NINTH birthday as the zenith of happiness. Until then, hang in there (if you need inspiration, look at the tooth...)

Randy said...

How weird is it that I couldn't wait to see how Diva's dentist trip went? I don't even HAVE kids. Anyway, now you've broken my heart and it's only nine in the morning my time. Poor, poor, little girl. I can't BELIEVE what our world's come to when a dentist can't jerk out a tooth that's hanging by a thread for fear of god knows what. Tell Diva that lots and lots of strangers she'll never even meet are wishing her a happy birthday and praying for that damn tooth to come out.

Anonymous said...

Wow, you are really such a great mom. Good luck with the tooth.

Jennifer said...

Good Lord i keep checking back, i'm concerned about the Birthday Diva

Rusty Nails said...

Manic, I'm sorry to hear that your days & Diva's are filled with this anxiety. But, over the past couple days it has only gotten worse (the dentist was no help, either). As painful and heartbreaking as it may be for you, you HAVE to take action. The pain will be momentary but the relief will be long lasting (physically & mentally). Steel yourself, woman; bear down and tug that tooth out. You've got to for peace of mind for the both of you. You love her so much that you want her to be miserable? I know you don't. Just do it. You gotta!! Good luck

Manic Mom said...

Oh my gosh, you guys are all so nice to show your concern for my Diva Baby. I like that mz. Jackson pointed out that she has a will of iron. I will remember that!

Also, Lisa, you make it sound like it's so easy, and I wish it were. She just KNOWS anytime I try to be sweet to her that I'm all about the YANK! I wish you guys could see how she reacts, (maybe I'll video her!) because she is clearly impossible!

Now, off to wrap her gifts. And later, a visit to Chuck E. Cheese--at least I'm hoping she'll eat the pizza!

Manic Mom said...

Oh Rusty Nails, if it were that easy! I know, maybe I'm a wimp, but I can't see myself holding her down. And if her dad does it, she will loathe him forever. However, if my dad were here (they live in Fla), he would not put up with this crap and the tooth would have long been gone.

How 'bout if I just quit worrying about it and let nature take its course!

(which, nature taking its course may be me hunkering down in her room at 2 a.m. with a flashlight and jamming that fucker outta there!)

Monnik said...

I'd get a new dentist. Couldn't he have had you sign something swearing you wouldn't sue?

Must be somethign strange about 8th birthdays... I spent the morning of my 8th birthday in the hospital because I had a nosebleed that wouldn't stop. They had to cauterize my nostrils (ouch!). I do remember that day even now.

You can make up for this morning. Just buy her great presents. A pony? A Wii? Whatever she wants! :) Kidding. But she won't blame you for this, so don't feel bad.

And tonight, go into her room while she's sleeping and yank that effer right out!

Happy Birthday Diva!

Lisa said...

Manic Mom - you've got to enlist Diva to help you pull it out. She needs to come to the conclusion that this little tooth needs to go, the quicker the better. "Aren't you hungry, honey? It's got to be tough to talk with that hanging in your mouth, you must be tired of repeating yourself. You don't want to swallow that tooth, do you? No? Well let's take care of it together. (yea team!)

All she's got to do is open wide and stay still, you've got to get a good grip on the little bugger, and quickly stuff a paper towel in her mouth.

If all this fails, with any luck she lose it when she bites into the pizza.

You can do it!!

TTQ said...

If it weren't for the climate of the blogs..I would have a few suggestions..
But alas..mouth zipped and sitting on my hands.

Jenster said...

I'm so sorry! I think the dentist is a wuss. I totally get Diva, though. I was the same way about my teeth. But throwing up?? Poor little thing.

Lisa said...

Got a great alternative suggestion - Milk Duds or Sugar Babies - get her to bite down on some of those and that tooth's a goner.

Thanks to Ernie in Accounting, who swears by this method.

Manic Mom said...

Lisa--ha ha. Tell Ernie that Diva HATES caramel.

See how hard this is!!!!

Thanks for thinking of her!

Colorado Writer said...

OMG. Sorry MM. That dentist is a damn pansy. Sheesh. WTF? Hope the dang tooth comes out soon. Can't Hubby do something? I don't think I could rip it out, but maybe you could if you wrapped your fingers in TP and yanked.

Colorado Writer said...

Are you all sweaty yet? I am, just by thinking about the commotion at the dentist's office. My oldest was freaked out on the day he got his palate expander and nearly jumped up every time they came near him. The orthodontist was sweaty and upset because of my son. I was mortified. I don't know how, but we just got the braces off after 3 years of ortho. Sucks, huh!

Sally T said...

I know how she feels. No one was allowed any where near my teeth when the were falling out at that age. It wasn't helped by well meaning members of the family relating how when they were children someone would tie a piece of string around the offending tooth with the other end tied to a door knob. All you did then was slam the door. As far as I was concerned if it dangled on a string of skin for a week that was fine by me. In fact, wiggling it in front of people seemed to bring me immense pleasure as far as I can recall :-)

Rusty Nails said...

Manic - I get ya. I read it mentioned before; but maybe the "push" vice pull method would work. That actually was the course of action my oldest took on one of his. He said it was easier and less painful than pulling. Had to do with angle and stuff. But, your 2am sneak attack sounds like it would work just as well.

The Anti-Wife said...

This is why I have dogs!

SportsDude & ShopperGal said...

poor girl. do like randy on my name is early and pull the tooth out with the door handle - only pull out the right tooth!

notlaughingatyourchildpromise! said...

I just hope Diva never accidentally sits on a sharp stick... ;)

Alicia said...

:(
Poor babe.

eatmisery said...

Geez, Manic...you give me so much to look forward to with my little girl. Gah!

Give her potato chips. That's how I remember losing baby teeth. If only your girl would eat...

Oh, The Joys said...

Ugh! effing dentists!

Manic Mom said...

SHe is still managing to eat with the one side of her mouth. She's very adept (is that the right word?) with figuring out how not to disturb that baby tooth. I think I might have to name it. It doesn't look like it's going anywhere soon!

I told her today that I admire her strong will as one of you mentioned (oh, it was mz. Jackson-if-you're-nasty! -- get it Janet Jackson? Digressing here!!!) and also told her that as long as she can eat and doesn't throw up anymore, we can just wait it out until the tooth comes out.

She had a very nice birthday, and I mentioned to her that a lot of people read my blog and said nice things about her and happy birthday so thank you all for caring about my little gal too!

XYZinn said...

OMG! Is this seriously what I have to look forward to??

mcewen said...

Mine had one hanging on by a thread for days - but just the word 'dentist' was enough to send him diving for cover. What a brave girl she as to go at al.
Cheers

Swishy said...

HOLY CRAP! I cannot believe it! The DENTIST couldn't get it out?!?! WTF?!?!?

I called earlier and left a message that I hoped Diva was having a good birthday. Maybe for her birthday, the tooth will fall out while she's sleeping tonight!

Beth said...

Happy Birthday Diva!!!

and some day you will be thankful that she has an iron will.....when all of her 13 yr. old friends are having sex and smoking weed, she'll be like,
"Uh, no thanks losers!"