There’s not been much to say. Last week was just a not-good week, so why bore you all with me being whiny, crying, bitchy. I do that enough around my family! I’m in a better frame of mind now; did not toss the computer or my husband or my children down the stairs, so I guess that’s sayin’ something!
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Finally went to the dermatdictologist. Yes, you read that right. My dermatologist is a D I C K! He talks to you like you’re four-and-a-half, and it might as well be a revolving door in his office the amount of time he spends with a patient. He actually scraped an X into my skin! With like a wooden toothpicky tool thing! Hard! So there was a mark like I was a cutter or something. When he was doing it, he said he was doing it to see if hives appear. No shit hives are gonna appear; you are ripping the first layer of skin off the inside softness of my arm! He is evil. And his diagnosis was pure BS if you ask me. Apparently, I have dermagraphihesadick. Apparently, five to 10 percent of ALL people get this. DRY-Freaking Skin! So, he gave me Allegra, and some prescription cortisone, told me to use non-scented soap like Dove Unscented (WHICH DUH! I already do!!!!), and a white unscented lotion. What a jackass.
However, I have not had the midnight itchies since I saw the bastard, so even if he is a dermadictologist… nah, never mind. I don’t like him regardless. And the freaking X was there for two days. I seriously almost took a picture to show you all how evil he is. Evil!
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The kids were having a debate on the different sexes. Tukey was saying he wished he were a girl so he could have a baby. Diva was saying there’s so much pressure when a woman has a baby and that he shouldn’t wish for that, and then somehow they were arguing about it, then Tukey was getting in Diva’s face and threw one down.
His best shot at Diva: “Yeah, well, you’re a TOILET-PAPER WASTER!”
What a GREAT comeback to put us women in our place, Tukey! We USE toilet paper when we pee! And boys don't! I might just have the most cleverest little boy in the entire world. And not only is he clever, he's also a TOILET-PAPER SAVER!
And then he said, just to bring his point all the way home: “When I pee, all I have to do is wiggle it!”
Just a little bit…
Man, you would not believe the stuff that comes up when you do a search on youtube for Wiggle It Just a Little Bit! How cute is THIS little girl I found on youtube?
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In other Manic stupid news... I had on this shirt the other day that the children just DO NOT LIKE. Ajers was like, “Mom, please change that shirt. It makes me uncomfortable.”
I wasn't going to change out of it. We were going to a HALLOWEEN STORE for crying out loud. My kid's not going to tell me he doesn't approve of what I WEAR!! That's MY job! I like this shirt. I mean it's got a skull on some chick's body!
Plus, it has the word CAFFEINE on the side of it; see that? It's like a skull-girl-chick who is full of caffeine. I don't know, there's a story to this for sure. It's Halloweenish, don't you think?
And, speaking of Halloween... SCARY or ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE?
Here’s to my half-birthday! And a better week ahead!
Oh, and just because there's not enough time in my life for the really important stuff, Tukey and I decided to make our own "Wiggle It" video:
Peace UP! Cuz feelin' down just SUX!