i WeNT SoMeWHeRe

So, I haven’t blogged in a while but I have a good excuse. I got whisked away to Florida for five days. It was lazy, relaxing and fun all rolled into one big HOT and HUMID time. Here are my FB updates which is kind of like a mini-blog post, and also my Tweets about my "Twip." Twy and cweate a short stowy about what you read here and post it in the comments!

From FACEBOOK:

is afraid that she might have killed the puffer fish.

is drinking a mudslide beachside.

is waiting for her toes to dry...lincoln park after dark.

is glad the puffer fish is not dead.

is done eating. can she have another espresso martini? and is mom and dad watching the kids?

is pleased that waiter said hubby reminds him of vince vaughn. vince is first on my list of five!!

is freaked that out of all the bars in the world elevation, u2's chicago cover band is at the same bar in tampa that i'm in. macdinton's. conna can u meet me? leslie and rob come on out.

is shit. first time i dropped my new phone. not the last.

is wondering if anyone in this bar has real tits and why does it feel so good to pee right now?

is loving facebooking in public.

i cant say a 3 syllasble word but i could prolly dive home. my r letter sticks. drive i mean. you and me baby we aint nothin but mammals.

am home from dinner and U2 fake concert. Would go to sleep but I think expresso martinis might thwart that idea.
 
done for the night.

Saturday update: Puffer Fish - thriving. Me, not so much.

So, our family has often talked about pitching a reality TV show called "So I Married a Rhyne (not real maiden name)." We've got the theme song all figured out ... "I thought my life was going fine, until I found myself marrying a Rhyne!" Insert Country-White Trash Slang.

After purchasing super plus tampons at Walgreen's and ONLY that, the guy asks: "Do you want your receipt?" Me: "No thanks, I don't think I'll need to return these."

is going to stuff her face yet again. filet, baked potato, chopped salad, broc casserole,vino, chocolate cake. vacation sux.

is glad the puffer fish is not dead.

Can someone wire my mouth shut until the end of the year please. NO.MORE.FOOD.

is waiting for her plane to arrive and wishing for a nap.

thinks chicago is cold but florida is hot.

is exhausted.

And now the Tweets from the Twip:

1.Gotta finish packing. Au voir. Whatever the hell that means. Ha, I really know.

2.Heading to airport for an adventure2:42 PM Oct 7th from txt

3.Touchdown tampa.7:38 PM Oct 7th from txt

4.Now that I'm in Tampa, the first place I'm going to get food is CHICK FILA! Be jealous.8:33 AM Oct 8th from web

5.Am at chick fila getting ready to order! happy dance10:02 AM Oct 8th from txt

6.Just watched last night's #glee episode. HOw can that show not make you happy and dancy? Love every aspect of it!12:11 PM Oct 8th from web

7.Am on my second margarita-I make 'em with frozen limeade, sugar, triple sec, tequila, and a topper of amaretto. Vacation.5:28 PM Oct 8th from web

8.In the same state as Bono TWICE. Since I was puking at the 1st concert cuz of a migraine, think Bono will give me a ticket? Connections NE1?8:50 AM Oct 9th from web

9.Am drinking a mudslide beachside. Nice.11:52 AM Oct 9th from txt

10.Waiter just said hubby reminds him of vince vaughn. Vince is #1 on my list of five. How did he know?7:44 PM Oct 9th from txt

11.Am in a bar oin tampa listening 2 a chicago u2 covert band ive seen b4. What r the odds?9:49 PM Oct 9th from txt

12.Having a geat time getting effed up in a bar watching u2 cover banmd from chicago. Go elevation10:25 PM Oct 9th from txt

13.all the bars in the world, what's the odds that the U2 cover band Elevation from Chicago that I have seen is playing in this tampa bar?11:32 PM Oct 9th from web

14.You'll all be pleased to know I am done for the night. Too bad the night was yesterday.11:37 PM Oct 9th from web

15.So yeah, I'm here.12:46 PM Oct 10th from web

16.So it's drinking/tweeting time. Awesome margaritas -- limeade, triple sec, tequila, sugar, ice. Top it with a shot of amaretto. Here we go!5:34 PM Oct 10th from web

17.it takes a very special person to fit in with this effed up family.6:08 PM Oct 10th from web

19.In fact, there's going to be a new reality show called, "So I Married a Rhyne. (not real maiden name)" ... and there's a theme song already ...6:09 PM Oct 10th from web

20.This is the top laziest vacation I've ever been on and it ROCKS!5:41 PM Oct 10th from web

21.I could have just brought PJs and a swim suit and I woulda packed too much.5:41 PM Oct 10th from web

22.Now playing WAR with my daughter, and drinking my second margarita. What's everyone else doing this glorious Saturday night?5:44 PM Oct 10th from web

23.Theme song: "I thought my life was going fine, then I screwed up and married a Rhyne!"6:09 PM Oct 10th from web

24.U have to sing that theme song in a white-trashy twang sorta sound. "I thought mah life was goin' fine-then I ruined it, married a Rhyne.6:10 PM Oct 10th from web

25.Today when I bought tampons & ONLY that, the guy asks: "Do you want your receipt?" Me: "No thanks, I don't think I'll need to return these."2:23 PM Oct 11th from web

26.am excited that i figured out how 2 get twitter on my phone!2:41 PM Oct 12th from web

27.If I could get away with slipping into bed for the night to sleep, I would so do it right now.4:22 PM Oct 12th from web

28.going to bed at 8pm.about 23 hours ago from web

Tell me what I did on vacation? Cuz I don’t remember!