Thursday, July 16, 2009

BeaR aTTaCK!

Just wanted to get your attention with that title!

It's Thursday, and I've written every day but can't access WIFI to throw all the stuff I wrote onto this blogger sign in, so a quick recap of our adventure to Yellowstone:

Number of hikes: 5
Number of hikes where I about died: 5
Number of times Tukey said "This is the best vacation in my entire life!": 1
Number of times Tukey said "I hate this stupid vacation and I want to go home!": 1
We've hiked Mount Washmore, Mystic Falls, Thumb Basin, Elephant Back, to name a few.
Number of states we have been in: 5; Illinois, Idaho (right now, we're in Victor, Idaho in a gorgeous home, and in the garage a note says: Bears in the area, make sure to close garage door at all times!), Montana, Wyoming, Utah (home of the famed Dooce!)

Animal sightings:
countless freaking bison (they were grazing BEHIND our cabin - wait till you see the photos!)
countless Mule deer
Two bears, one of which was a grizzly, the other I think was a brown bear - have video of both sightings
One moose - AMAZING!
One antelope or deer (debatable because it probably was a deer, but it was crossing "Antelope Creek")
One elk
One snake (on a rock sunbathing)
Some cute chipmunks
Ducks, squirrels, birds, and the usual stuff you see.

Number of time Diva has fallen during a hike and screamed at the top of her lungs you would have thought a bear was attacking: 1
Number of times Tukey complained of car sickness: 4,328
Number of times Tukey actually puked in car: 0
Number of times Ajers actually puked in car: 1
Number of times Mr. Manic pissed me off on top of a mountain: 2
Number of times I was by myself on a hike and could SWEAR I heard a bear in the woods and my heart started racing and I almost pissed myself: 1
Number of times I have used the "Go Girl" take-with-you product to help you pee in the woods without getting pee all over you: 2
Number of times I got pee all over me while using the "Go Girl": 1
Number of appletinis I have drank on this trip: 7
Number of hangovers: 0
Number of loads of laundry I did at the lodge: 4
Number of times I have thought I am a fat ass and need to get in shape as soon as we get home: A trillion

Today we go horseback riding. Hope all is well with everyone! And thanks to Jodi - we went up Mystic Falls, and we also went to Mammoth at your suggestions, and yeah, Mystic Falls was HARD!

Anyway, PEACE UP everyone!


Kristin said...

Glad the trip is going well! I can't wait to see your pictures and video!

Kirsten said...

Wow, that is a LOT of wildlife to see on one trip. And when I was on our family vaca to Disneyworld I thought I was an out of shape fat-ass belly jelly roll monster a gazillion times, so I have you beat there.

pixiemama said...

You need a spa day when you get back. Or a spa weekend.


Mame said...

So. Damn. Funny.

Just Sayin... said...

I totally fell for the title! *gasp* NO WAY!


Glad you're having a great time!
woot woot

MaBunny said...

Sounds like you are having a great time! I have heard of those 'go girl ' thingies - did u purchase them over the net?
Wish i was there - I've never been@

Gina said...

It sounds wonderful, even with the car-puking, screaming , and peeing on yourself. I'm envious.

morninglight mama said...

You had me giggling during this whole post, but when you totaled the number of times you got pee all over you, I cracked the eff up!! Can't wait to see your pics!

Reagan said...

What brand of hiking boots did you get? I'm looking for some suggestions and the 'no blisters' part sounds great! Thanks!

March2theSea said...

sounds like a blast..looking forward to the recap!

My Two Army Brats said...

I LOVE moose! I miss seeing them in our yard all the time when we lived in Alaska. Home.

I totally didn't fall for your title cause you would have had a better title if a bear really did attack. Something "should have run faster" would be good!

Kate said...

Sounds like one of those lots of fun stories if you can get through it kind of trips. =)

Michelle said...

Glad everyone's survived. So how often have you shouted that it's the best and worst vacation of your life?

And the go girl? I so thought you were joking. I'm so sad that you weren't :)

JODI said...

I am so glad to hear you did a few of my suggested hikes and are having a great time. I can't wait to see the pictures. We too had bison grazing right out our camper. Wild sight isn't it?!

Regardless of the times you peeed on yoursef or the hard work the hikes were-- it's hard to deny Yellowstone is God's touch on earth, isn't it?

Anonymous said...

I was worried you were lost in the wilderness since I haven't heard from you! Glad you guys are having fun! 143

Maureen Lipinski said...

Peeing on yourself + sweating + physical activity? Sounds like bootcamp, not vacay. Thank god for vodka! You will need an extra long day at the spa when you return!

Unknown said...

Sounds like a WONDERFUL time, aside from the puking, peeing on your self, mad at husband, bear attack thing. LOL

I never heard of a Go Girl. I have to look that up.

Read Divorce Party on my trip to Ohio, LOVED IT! But I really wanted Gwyn and Thomas to stay together at the end. Oh well.